Beefcakes: Where bingo is bitchy and the boys are pretty

All good intentions to be, well good, were tossed out the window when a drag queen named Champagne Le Roux labelled our table the “book club”. Soon “Dean” was the table centre piece with caramel vodka in his belly-button. It was Beefcakes’ Bitchy Bingo and the anniversary of B’s 21st after all, not the time to crack open the Jane Austen. Beefcakes Bitchy Bingo

Beefcakes isn’t a Girl’s Night hotspot for the superb entertainment, dangerous cocktails or the onion rings. It is all about the pretty boys. The gay establishment knows just how to hire these lovely creatures as waiters, barmen and bingo ball boys. That evening they all seemed to be the same height with similar sandy blond dos, someone obviously has a type. Our waiter had a slight resemblance to Supernatural’s Dean (Jensen Ackles), who just happens to be the lady of the evening’s type.

Our hostess for the evening, Champagne Le Roux, is my kind of drag queen; with a rockabilly vibe proudly showing off her cleavage of chest hair. Her personalised rendition of Blurred Lines was way more scandalous than Robin Thicke’s attempt. Champagne Le Roux  Beefcakes Bitchy Bingo

Bitchy Bingo is fun to play but only the brave and extremely competitive have any desire to win the bragging rights and a hamper made up of craft beer and sparkly paraphernalia. Winning means going up on stage with Lady Le Roux and only she leaves that stage looking cool.

The perfect companions for Bitchy Bingo is a table full of non-bitchy ladies, one I was lucky to be part of. Amongst them a body shot didn’t seem quite as sleazy. Oh who am I kidding it still was, but it was twice as funny. Especially when B got value for money when the shot glass fell over and she had to chase after the caramel vodka running down Dean’s 6 pack. After all, it’s no use crying over a spilled body shot.

* All images stolen off the Beefcakes Facebook page

* Bitchy Bingo takes place every Tuesday night at Beefcakes.
Cost: R50 (this will be automatically added to your bill)
Address: Sovereign Quay, 34 Somerset Road, Greenpoint
Book: 021 425 9019/


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