Payday Breakfast at Café Ruby

One of my favourite meals is the Payday Breakfast. What’s more wonderful than waking up to an SMS informing you that, for the next few hours anyway, you are rich! For a few hours you can pretend that this is the only meal that you’ll be paying for this month.CafeRubyInterior

On Saturday we went to a level 3* Payday Breakfast joint, Café Ruby at the Klein Roosboom Wine Farm in Durbanville. We have been there once before and were impressed with the speed of the kitchen and the insanely delicious farm bread toast. Entrance

This time around the kitchen was somewhat slower which I assumed meant they’re baking more bread, I was more than ok with this. The portions at Café Ruby are not that big but the quality of the food can justify the prices.

The breakfast special at Café Ruby

The breakfast special at Café Ruby

The Plus One went for the Boere Breakfast (Two rashers of bacon, two fried eggs, grilled tomato, boerewors, mushrooms and two slices of farm bread) at R60 while The Eleven Year Old and I had the poached eggs, bacon, mushrooms and basil on toast special at R59. On the corner of my toast I added a splash of strawberry jam which went down swimmingly with the pesto. The Eight Year Old supplemented his mini farm breakfast (a fried egg, crispy bacon and a slice of toast) with another piece of toast (R20 + R5).

"Why do you keep taking photos of my food" - The Eight Year Old

“Why do you keep taking photos of my food” – The Eight Year Old

If rap music videos thaught us anything it will be that it isn’t extravagant until you open a bottle of Crystal. Or a bottle of Altydgedacht MCC Blanc de Blanc at a reasonable R95. Next time I might just order toast with pesto and strawberry jam and the bottle (or two it’s Payday Breakfast after all).

The men's restroom door is wallpaperd with traffic fines

The men’s restroom door is wallpaperd with traffic fines

The décor of Café Ruby is a minimalist shabby chic with unexpected quirky touches. The bathroom doors of the ladies bathroom is decorated with vintage magazine adverts, pretty but this kind of design element has been done death by most quirky establishments. The men’s restroom doors had a different spin on the concept. They are adorned with final notices of traffic fines, by far the most expensive wallpaper I have ever heard of!

*Level 5 being the most uitspattig 

Photos by @glanskind

Klein Roosboom

Klein Roosboom

The Plus One with the kids

The Plus One with the kids

With The Plus One in the vinyard

With The Plus One in the vineyard

Guest Post: You’re so lucky you live here!

You know that saying; “You never miss something until its gone.”?

Well, I’ve heard that saying many times about many things, and while it’s usually followed by a mental note to self to spend more time with the family, the fact is, many times we only realise it’s too late when it is too late…thus the reason we have these sayings in the first place.

View from Signal Hill in Cape Town

View from Signal Hill in Cape Town

As a born and bred CapeTownian, I took it to heart when I recently overheard some Jozi based colleagues discuss how we take for granted our beautiful city. How dare they? With their ridiculously high salaries, shopping addictions and BMW’s! How dare they come into my city and tell me I don’t appreciate it enough? Hmmmph!

But the truth is that the Jozians were right, we do take for granted the fact that, just around the corner, there are endless options for enjoying the city, whether you’re budgeting or not. So on a stunning Sunday, with the Mother City showing off her best weather, some of my favourite friends in tow, I picnicked up on Signal Hill for the very first time! photo2We found a lovely secluded spot, a bit off the beaten track (I’m sworn to secrecy so don’t ask). Laying out our selection of cheeses (and box wine) we were about as close to perfection as one could possibly get until a shadow happened upon us. But it wasn’t a cloud, no dahling, this is Cape Town, it was a paraglider taking full advantage of the most flawless weather to float down from Table Mountain and have little mid flight chats with us picnickers (read: plebs) below.

And undoubtedly the happy paraglider was from Jozi or Pretoria or some other dreadful place (read: not Cape Town) and good for them! I say go on, keep coming back and keep reminding us how lucky we are, and like me, hopefully one lucky CapeTownian will realise it and experience something amazing in our city before it’s too late.

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By Cara-Lee Arendse (Hardcore CapeTownian)
@CaraleeA

The nun called James

This week my belief that there is always a new corner of Cape Town to be explored was once again confirmed, this time by a rather rude and obnoxious nun. I came across said nun though a serious of clicking on random Twitter mentions on my timeline. Her name is Sister Mary James or as his disapproving deceased mother used to call him, James.

James

Sister Mary James is the nun-in-drag alter ego of James Costello. Both are loud, crass and spontaneous but only one wears a habit. On entering one of the ‘creative spaces’ at Fabrik8 in Observatory we were loud greeted by Costello before I was introduced to the whole room as Captain Jana. I take titles very seriously, especially one given by a stand-up drag queen, so I promptly started drinking like a sailor.

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My mission was made even easier with the ice-lollies being spiked! The devilish delights were sponsored by Las Paletas, makers of gourmet artisanal ice lollies. (I did feel rather dirty typing those hippy terms, but to taste them is to accept their hipster origins). We came across Las Paletas’ alcoholic range of lollies at Ramfest this year and even though it was a cold night, the Mojito-on-a-stick took us right to the beach. However, this had nothing on the (sadly non-alcoholic) guava cheesecake lolly made from real cream cheese and guava. I swiftly gobbled up my 2 allotted lollies and would have stolen a third had I not been terrified of the possibility of Sister Mary James dragging me to a confessional.

Las Paletas

Like all stand-up comedians, Sister Mary James does not let go once she has your scent. The show was largely -improvised and the demented nun drew most of her laughs from the audience. And what a crowd it was, they made it all too easy for her. My cynical side is not convinced that two people would go to a drag stand-up gig for their first date, or that an excessively thin woman in thigh high boots and a mini dress would keep standing up in the front row to go to the bathroom or that there is a gay guy called Sven who is a rep for Cadbury. However, the combination of these people in one room lead to a perfect storm of comedy stirred on by Sister Mary James.

SMJ

Sister Mary James’ larger than life persona makes everything extra funny. Well almost everything. I realised that my tolerance and enjoyment of shock comedy ends at any form of rape joke. But that’s how it is with shows like this, it makes one realise that despite seeing oneself as liberal and open to just about anything, there are still lines that can be crossed. That was not the line for other audience members, but it was mine. And there is nothing wrong with that.

Theatre Review: Twitch

The debut play of award-winning actor Robert Fridjhon, Twitch uncovers a rich source of comedy in the seemingly dull world of bird watching. Twitchers, as ardent birdwatchers lovingly refer to themselves, are a rather odd bunch, often rather more birdbrained than the feathered beings on the other side of their binoculars. Fridjhon unerringly taps into this deep well of ridiculousness to create a uniquely South African piece of theatre.

Twitch Theatre on the Bay

The set by Greg King is almost cartoonish in its crooked windows and exaggerated perspective. This serves as the perfect backdrop for the hilarities ahead.

Twitch is brought to life by an exceptionally potent ensemble. Michael Richard plays Finlay, a character who is passionately involved in the obscure world of birding and slightly less passionately married to Maddie (the multi-award-winning Louise Saint-Claire) who seems to more of a personal assistant than a partner. They are joined for a birdwatching competition in the Kruger National Park by fellow twitcher Harper (Russel Savadier) and his wife, Venice (Bronwyn Gottwald) who would not be able to tell a finch from a dove.

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Bronwyn Gottwald (Venice) and Russel Savadier (Harper ) in Theatre on the Bay’s Twitch

The fact that there are two directors, Steven Stead and Charmaine Weir-Smith, perhaps contributes to the interplay of subtle nuance with boisterous acting. When Harper talks about the uncertainty of his child’s paternity it is as though it is being told by unconnected person: the emotion on his face does not meet his voice. When Finlay laughs it’s a completely different story. The man laughs with his entire being.  His face goes bright red and before you know it you too are laughing. No matter what your complexion, you will also have a red face. Twitch is complexion-changing funny!

As the foursome waits in anticipation for rarities such as the Martial Eagle, the audience observes the dysfunctional dynamic that unfolds between them. If you are a twitcher you will laugh with Twitch and if not, you will laugh at it. Fridjhon spins an intricate web, creating inside jokes within the play.  So while you won’t necessarily find insight on how to deal with a significant other’s weird hobby or obsession, you will be able to add a few snappy one liners to your arsenal.

Agreed?*

*Find out why this is so funny at Theatre on the Bay between 15 May and 1 June 2013.

This review originally appeared on WhatsoninCapeTown.com

Wolftown single launch at It’s a House

It’s a House is the elephant graveyard of hipster ideas, just a lot more cluttered. Every millimetre of the space is a photo opportunity. If Instagram had a throne room this would be it. The hipster vibe was almost tangible, I started craving organic things and growing an ironic ‘stach the second that I entered the room. Only two things could save me: a stiff drink and good music. This being the launch of Wolftown’s third single, Don’t you know, the latter was a given.

The coffee counter at It's a House

The coffee counter at It’s a House

The former wasn’t forthcoming. It took our waiter an hour after ordering to tell us that the ingredients of our cocktail is out of stock and then another 45 minutes to bring the replacement order. Once again music will have to save the day. WolftownBand

The line-up was a triumvirate of local female fronted voices: Wolftown, Lexi Frame and Jae Braun.

Wolftown is a three piece outfit from Cape Town consisting of Sarah Pope (vocals and guitar), Damian Upton (bass and guitar) and Kyle Sanders on drums and percussion.

Don't you know

Don’t You Know is a classic love song made epic with Sarah Pope’s soulful voice. The song is super catchy but somehow I doubt it will get on my nerves if it was placed on heavy rotation on a radio station.

WolftownKeys

When Wolftown opened for Woodstock Mafia’s EP launch last year I was in awe of the dedicated fans for an opening act without a full length album. This is sure to be a trend that will only escalate with their debut album “Soul on Fire” set to be released in June.

Theatre Review: Long Street Nights

I walked through the door of the Baxter’s Golden Arrow Studio and stepped into a club on Cape Town’s famous Long Street. It was all there: the bustling of people talking, the flashing lights that are never coordinated and the tiny outfits on pretty girls. I caught myself thinking, “Wonder if there will be any cute guys here tonight?” Back in the day that’s what I wanted from Long Street. In Long Street Nights the characters are not that far off.

LongStreetNights

Long Street Nights focuses on six archetypes that frequent this street, sourced by the actors themselves after prowling Long Street itself during some of its seediest hours. There’s party girl Mia (Natasha Dryden), Catherine the DJ past her prime (Daneel van der Walt), politician and tenderpreneur Duma (Thami Mbongo), a naïve boy from the township Sizwe (Thando Doni), Fabian (Antonio Fisher) a barman and Jasmine (Riana Alfreds) the single mother business owner. Much like my student self they all have certain things they want from Long Street.

This is not a six degrees of separation story although it is inevitable that some of the characters do cross paths. Director Nicky Rebelo expertly weaves the different stories to create a raw and honest portrayal of Long Street’s night life.

The cast of The Baxter's Long Street Nights with director

The cast of The Baxter’s Long Street Nights with director Nicky Rebelo

The characters are completely authentic; these are the people that you’ll encounter in a stroll down Long Street. Which begs the question: why pay the theatre admission if you can just meander down the street? The answers are numerous: Long Street Nights is a fly-on-the-wall experience, a chanceto listen to the distilled, raw truth that only a bottle of tequila will bring out. And you’ll be able to hear it. And you’ll be able to remember it. So book your seat at the Baxter now.

Long Street Nights runs at the Baxter Theatre’s Golden Arrow Studio 8 May to 1 June 2013.

This review originally appeared on WhatsoninCapeTown.com

Just Add Water Mother

I have a lot respect of mothers. Single moms, moms who get no support from their husbands/boyfriends, heck even moms who are in supportive relationships. If I think of all the drama I’ve bestowed on my own mother… to this day. So to all the mothers, please don’t take offence in this post, the last thing I want to do is highjack your day. But….255497_10151191113888970_1705268145_n…being a “Just-Add-Water Mother” is extra sucky on this day.

I’m engaged to a wonderful man, The Plus One, with 2 children who live with us. When we walk together (especially in the Northern Suburbs of Cape Town) I can see people doing the math. First the age difference between me and TPO, then between myself and the kids.

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Let me simplify it for you (I say in a cool bitchy voice worthy of a chick flick show down) I’m 17 years younger than my beau, 17 years older than the youngest boy. I’ll end the speech with a deadly stare and flick my hair. Then I walk into a pillar because I just daydreamed the whole scene, expect the calculating looks.

I definitely don’t want credit on this day. I am not maternal. I don’t fill the mother shaped hole in the door left by their biological mother. They have a wonderful grandmother and a super multitasking father for that. Mother’s Day just reminds me that I’m still very confused as to what my role is in their lives are.

I can do better.

Theare Review: Die Leo’s

Most families have a black sheep. (If you don’t think you family has one it’s most likely you.) This does not always mean a complete delinquent; it’s just one family member that stands out from the rest. In the Leo family there are 4 of them. None of them seem to fit into what should be a traditional Afrikaans nuclear family of four.Die Leos

I will follow Sandra Prinsloo to the ends of the earth, if only she was on Twitter. On Thursday night it was to the middle of Voortrekker Street for Wordsmith’s Theatre Factory’s Die Leos at the The Bellville Civic Centre.

Die Leo’s is translated in Afrikaans from Nicky Silver’s Broadway play The Lyons. The story unfolds around on Ben Leo’s cancer death bed in the hospital. His wife Linda (Prinsloo) is planning a major do over for the house from magazines while his two children, Lisa (Erica Wessels) and Koert (Jacques Theron), have no idea what is going on.

Die Leo's

Sandra Prinsloo and Tobie Cronje in Die Leo’s

Fok, maar hulle vloek baie in die produksie. Is it too fucking much or does it add to the narrative? For one thing it is moer funny. It is as if translator and director Hennie van Greunen went down the list of Afrikaans swear words and invented a few new ones of his own. If you’re easily offended by curse words stay away, don’t even cross the boerewors curtain for the next week. If not, hearing Sandra Prinsloo swearing, all dolled up in over applied suburban kerk tannie makeup, is a real treat.

Tobie Cronje is brilliant at playing a narky character. His face is so expressive that he only needs to pull it at a certain angle and you’ll feel his unhappiness even if he should use a sunshine voice. Top that off with a super irritable tone and you have the perfect storm of one ticked off man.

Sandra Prinsloo, Tobie Cronjé and Erica Wessels in Die Leo's

Sandra Prinsloo, Tobie Cronjé and Erica Wessels in Die Leo’s

Francois Griebenow summed up the play the best at Theatre Scene Cape Town’s TweetSeats:  “Die lewe is kort. Connect. #dieleos” (Life is short. Connect.) In the end all the characters do find a way to connect in their own dysfunctional way.

Die Leo’s is funny, it’s sad, it’s just a little too much. It is the kick in the backside that the nonexistent theatre scene in Cape Town’s Northern Suburbs needed.

                  Die Leo’s runs at the Bellville Civic Centre from 9-17 May 2013.  

I am not a Belieber but…

This is a mildly shameful post. I went to a Justin Bieber concert and I liked it.

My official story is that it was for the children. It was their Christmas present. Truthfully, it was for 12 year old Jana. She got her first pimple last week and I needed to cheer her up.

At least I am not THIS Jana

At least I am not THIS Jana

In the weeks leading up to the show, the Eight Year Old watched Justin Bieber music videos every day. The Eleven Year Old was less enthusiastic. Buying concert tickets for a preteen a few months in advance is not always such a great idea. Bieber is not cool any more. Apparently Skrillex is all the rage. Not when Skrillex was actually in the country of course.

For once Big Concerts got the opening acts right by selecting South African performers who fit in the main act’s demographic. Chiano Sky held her own amongst the boys in skin tight red ‘leggings as pants’. I suspect the Beliebers might have been slightly jealous of the fact that she got to meet Bieber because she definitely did not get the cheer that she deserved. The Locnville twins, on the other hand, were met with screams to the tune of roughly 75% of the decibels that for Bieber.

Proof: We did bring the kids

Proof: We did bring the kids

The wait was excruciating. For the Beliebers. I spent that time going to the restroom, created false hope by pointing randomly at exits while shrieking and not standing in the queue at the bar. The lack of a queue was Utopia. The Beliebers spent the time going hysterical every time there was a slight change in scenery. A changeover of song, a sneeze, a pin dropping.

Then there was the ultimate change of scenery: A loud bang, a blinding flash from the stage and a ten minute countdown on the screens. A short high pitched 10 minutes later the man himself swaggered on stage all decked out in white with a walk best described as zombie gangster. The Beliebers went crazy. The cool people who were only there as “chaperones” went crazy. Even the guy selling biltong had a glint in his eye.

Bar

If only the bar sold fat free non-alcoholic Justin Bieber saliva

The amount of money and planning that went into that show is second only to the Lady Gaga Monster’s Ball. Pyrotechnics that shot high into the air, HD screens that looked better than the real thing, amazing dancers and a killer stage set up.

There was no skandaal. No throwing up or people tackling Justin Bieber. It was a perfectly executed pop concert. There were hints of something more like when Justin performed snippet of rapper Tyga’s Rock City with his bassist. Then it was back to pop business making the girls fall even harder in love with him by grabbing his crotch.

There's a sold out stadium concert, then there's this

There’s a sold out stadium concert, then there’s this

Five songs into the set the Eight Year Old fell asleep. Yes, he slept through the high pitched shrieks of 45 000 + beliebers. He was recovering from the flu but he didn’t want to miss the show. We left about 6 songs later and he was safely tucked in bed by 22:20.

The 12 year old Jana is happy and will go back to her dormant state for the foreseeable future. The 25 year old Jana needs a good rock show now. One where a stupid brat won’t kick her chair. And where she won’t refer to herself in the third person.

The Eleven Year Old had a blast in spite of himself. He might even admit to his friends that he was there. Likely not.

* Photos by @glanskind

Following our noses down the West Coast on Worker’s Day

On May Day we woke up with nothing more exciting on the agenda than a mountain of washing. Rather shameful for a public holiday propped in the middle of the week! So instead we hit the road with only a vague destination of Yzerfontein in mind. Simply following our noses down the West Coast.

Groote-Post

Darling, home of South Africa’s most famous woman Evita Bezuidenhout, is usually a popular stop on a West Coast excursion. A stop we had every intent of making. However, once we spotted the Groote Post Wine Estate Tannie Evita didn’t stand a chance.

WineTasting

The tasting room at Groote Post

The Old Man’s Sauvignon Blanc is exceptionally fruity on the nose, but for the first time ever it was the wooded chardonnay that captured our taste buds (and later also my sobriety). It was rather unexpected as I usually love Sauvignon Blanc above all else. The dry Old Man brute rose was also a winner.

Restaurant

The Groote Post Restaurant

The restaurant was sublime. All the tables in the courtyard were taken but we could still appreciate the exceptional weather from our window table.

The Plus One opted for the steak roll as recommended by the wine tasting lady. “Steak roll” is rather a deceptive name that makes one think of second rate cuts smothered in sauce. This steak roll was rather special with at least 300g of steak. I had a platter of local cured meats, relish and amazingly fresh bread off the starter menu. The Plus One would have gladly traded half his steak for a spoonful of my plum and apple relish.

SteakRoll

A steak roll with wedges and homemade tomato sauce at the Groote Post Restaurant

I liked that they have kiddie options on the menu as R110+ for a main is rather steep for food that will potentially only be nibbled on. The kids both had fish and wedges which they enjoyed, except for the chunky homemade tomato sauce. Well, all of us liked the sauce sans the Eight Year Old who could not understand why it did not taste like All Gold. He just couldn’t wrap his head around it.

Fish and chips

The Eight Year Old before he tasted the homemade tomato sauce.

For dessert we headed over to Yzerfontein. Once again we went on the recommendation of the wine tasting lady and went to Beaches for crème brulee. The dessert was lovely (the Plus One had seconds) but the atmosphere was lacking.

Creme

Beaches

The Plus One discovered the panoramic function on this phone’s camera at Beaches in Yzerfontein

BathBeaches

The bathroom at Beaches has an interesting take on decor

After a quick frolic on the beach and we headed back home to Cape Town happy not to have done a stitch of work on Worker’s Day.

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The spawn vadering* on the beach

*For all the non geeks: Vadering

Images (except the bathtub which was in the little girls room) by @glanskind